Friday, 8 March 2013

One moment in time..?

I've been staring and thinking on the screen for more than two hours, and I typed and backspaced to delete it, then I typed again, then I deleted it again, and I typed and deleted it again. It just repeated for numberless times. It's because I don't know how to start it.

I think ... everything in this post should be written in past-tense.


Had you ever feel lost? Thinking that no one cares about you? Wondering why you still alive? Digging around and found no answer what's living for? I thought I came across these last time, and I thought everyone would think about this once in awhile. 

* oh God, how to start this..? *

Still remember my friend that I talked about last time? In the post of  " Good, better and the best. ", he went back to JB and asked me out because it had been a long time we didn't see each others after he went KL. Then he headed back to KL because his off-days were over, and after that I'd heard nothing about him because he didn't contact me only after few days ago, I received a message from him.

And everything went wrong.

It wasn't send by himself but his second-brother,

" This is his second brother, he just passed away yesterday 4 pm at his condo in Kuala Lumpur, today his body will reached JB at 6 pm. Do coem and visit him to pay the deepest condolence and Say Goodbye to him. "

I didn't believe because it's kinda unbelievable. But after I checked on FB and I only found out that it was all real. He jumped from the 8th floor and dead without leaving any last word. It's shocking to know one of my friend just passed away, I believed you would be shocked too, right?

I'd been asking myself how much of pressure could make one committed suicide. I couldn't get the answer.

I always thought that he's a guy that had a strong heart in every moment, the way he talked and acted, he just look like a strong guy who I never thought of would kill himself. He really impressed me when we first known each others, he got so many thoughts and who was always stay true to himself and all his opinion he came across his mind. It's impressive for someone who was only two years older than me.

And again, he impressed me for his last time by killing himself.

I just felt so weird. Was it sad? Definitely yes. But I really upset for this kind of act, and it happened in my friend some more? It's very unacceptable because it's different from my definition of life.

I didn't understand his perspective, so I couldn't blame him for acting like that. But what I knew was at that moment of death, he never thought of others who cared about him. It's kinda hurtful, even you just cut your freaking vein on your wrist, your friends and family would yell at you, what if you jumped and smashed your body?


There's always a way out of the dark tunnel, because light never fades. Hope never dies either way.

One nly have one life in his lifetime. And for once in a life time, you want to end it up. What logic is that? You gonna work it out no matter how bad situation is that, because God live at our side, he lead us and save us. Unless you're a sinner then I've nothing to comment.

Faith is very important in every decision we made. I don't really think that suicidal is a faith-ful decision, it doesn't make sense in any way. Everyone will have bad time in their life, but it just bad time, it's not doomsday, even doomsday had passed. 

How to describe life?

It's like Harry Potter series. Voldemort jumped out in the middle of the story and kill and scream and yell and he own a freaking flat nose. It's like the collapse version of Micheal Jackson's nose, and it's pathetic to hell. That's the bad part of your life, when all the things just went so wrong, but you know you will kill Voldemort if you read the book before the movie. ( Even you don't read, common sense tells the same. )

You have to wait for the better, and never lost in hope. Remember what I talked about The Secret and the positive thinking? You cannot be defeated by those bad days because your life gonna be forever bad days if you do that. You never have a moment of happiness? 

Think of your friends and family, because they're your inspiration and your hope. Happiness is what happened when the inspiration came across your mind.

See? Nothing is impossible. Steve Job can create iPhone and why you can't just be positive? It's damn easy compare to create iPhone right?

If you're not an Apple fans, then think of Mark Zuckerberg, he created Facebook, and please give a smile if you think that smiling is much more easier than writing programmes for Facebook.

If you don't like Facebook, then nevermind. What are you doing now? You thought that make someone to read on your blog is very easy? If not, then please be positive like me because blogging is kinda hard compare to think of my happiness moment.

It just another second until you realise how big you can be after you kill yourself, so just wait for a moment before you wanna die because you will know how pro you are and how life can be very meaningful. You need to accept things in your life, and let them go. 

If you keep reading the same chapter of your life, you will never go for the next chapter.

If you need a rest, you can go for a sleep. If you need some time to think for a solution, you can have your time. But you can't do anything if you're not breathing for more than 5 minutes.


Journal of the day of an emo person who turns into someone awesome :
  • Wake up in the morning.
  • Breakfast..
  • Go to school..
  • Had a fight with my lover...... </3
  • Jump of the school building...
  • Think of life PROPERLY.
  • Feel so great and sleep.

This is One Moment in Time by Whitney Houston. This is an inspiring song. In some way, I really think that we need to wait for the perfect time but not acting harshly because there's always a time for us to shine.

Everyone is great, because everyone has his one moment in time.

Everyone should be loved, and you need to be loved.

Oh, bye..

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